Where do I even start? This past year has been an incredibly interesting one. On Sunday I turn 28. Most years when my birthday comes around it doesn’t really feel like much, another year, the same thing over and over just a new number. This time is different, very different.
There have been so many changes, some good, some bad, the thing about change is that you can never prepare yourself for it. I have really tried my best to be transparent with you here in this small space I’ve created for myself, but of course it’s only natural to want to focus on the positive. Some things you just want to keep private, at least until you move on from them.
I have found myself in situations I would have never imagined, faced with things that threaten my worldly comforts and torn from a very safe life. The thing about getting older is that you change, so of course (naturally) your life would change too. Right?
Though there have definitely been some rough spots this year and some I’m still dealing with, there has also been hope. I have learned the importance of persistence and fighting/making sacrifices for the things I truly want. So what do I want? I want to keep getting creative, work with talented people, to inspire and be inspired, and I want that to be my life…and of course have that life be able to sustain me financially, even if it means only just getting by. Easier said than done my friends.
Recently I have been trying to reflect back on the person I once was, reminding myself of things that made me happy and trying to tap back into some of that. Though I am very proud of the person I have become (in most aspects), I have also developed some pretty unhealthy habits that I’m not necessarily proud of. I think sometimes when you’re so focused on trying to make something work, you find time for little else. It’s not healthy to become so obsessive. Sometimes you need to make space for something else, even if it feels like taking a step back.
So what have I done? I’ve signed up for dance classes again for starters. If you didn’t already know, I have about fifteen years of dance experience, but for the last five or so I have taken zero classes. I had my first one last week and it was SO much fun! I really can’t wait to do more. I’ve also been taking crazy long walks throughout the city to just take time to think and get outside. I love walking and always feel so much more calm after I’ve had a long solo walk.
Other than that, I’m working on a creative photo trip with Justine to LA and Palm Springs next month. I seriously do not know why we haven’t thought of this in the past, but the change of scenery will be very very refreshing. We already have a few brands on board that we’ll be working with, but overall we just want to take as many photos in as many locations as physically possible! It will be great to have some solid and consistent content here. Obviously I’ve been slacking a little, my bad.
Lastly I’ve been thinking about getting a part-time job. It may come as a huge shocker to you that it’s very hard to make money as a blogger…right? Groundbreaking. There is still a part of me that feels like a failure for even considering this, but there is something to be said for taking a step back and in doing so I can relieve some of the pressure off of what I do here. As a stubborn person by nature, I am in no way giving up, but I do think me earning some more stable income will benefit both me and my work.
Of course I want to take the time to thank my friends, the people that have stood by my side through the pleasant and not-so-pleasant. I’ve never been the type to have a lot of friends, but the ones I do have are truly the finest. Anneke, Melanie, Justine, Caroline, you are ones that keep me going. Your encouragement, love (and tough love) are appreciated and needed more than you could ever imagine. And to you, my readers, thank you for your comments, messages, e-mails, everything. I will never get tired of reading what you have to say and absolutely love that you feel comfortable to voice your opinions and reach out with questions or offer advice. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.